Naked Bike-Riding Portlanders Are Nonviolent, Joyful, and Compassionate
Oregon Rain Won't Stop Us From Protesting ICE's Unconstitutional Cruelty
Thousands of bighearted water-resistant Oregonians took to their bikes, wheelchairs, unicycles, roller skates, scooters, hoverboards, and one penny-farthing in varying degrees of undress on October 12, 2025.
Neither the cold nor the rain was going to stop us from utilizing our own vulnerability, in community. We came to protest cruelty and inhumanity in Portland, Oregon, one of hundreds of sanctuary jurisdictions across the U.S., the land of the free.
And we are protesting the MAGA administration’s threat to deploy federalized National Guard troops into Portland to “deescalate” nonexistent “left-wing radicalism”.
So organizers from the annual World Naked Bike Ride declared an emergency edition of the naked ride to peacefully prove to every media outlet covering “dystopian” Portland that naked Oregonians are not domestic terrorists. We’re just human rights activists who care about other people.
“We are using this protest to bring attention to the militarization of Portland and the ongoing and escalating harm that is happening to our immigrant and indigenous communities,” joint organizers announced. “ORS.163 allows this form of protest … The vulnerability of bodies could not be more explicit than seeing our neighbors kidnapped off our streets—while those who protest outside the ICE facility are met with violence.”
Chicken-suit guy, Jack Dickinson, who’s been demonstrating since June, said he “wanted to counter the show of force with farce.”
Before we set off, the organizers for the legally permitted ride reminded us to abide by all laws and naked bike ride etiquette, to respect our fellow riders, and to follow the directions of the designated crossing guards/route guides in hot pink reflective vests. People touched up their body paint, strangers shared hand-warmer packets with each other, we fastened our bike helmets, and took off.
How might naked or semi-naked Oregonians express their political harmlessness in the rain? Each rider had their own unique way to cover or uncover themselves for the afternoon ride. But everyone utilized what is now being called “tactical frivolity”. An inflatable shark rode past an almost naked man in a tie-dyed speedo. Hundreds of people wore nothing but clear ponchos. The inflatable unicorns were joined by an axolotl, a penguin, an octopus, and T-rexes. Most naked people had inspiring messages and calls to action painted on their backs and even butt cheeks.
We cruised alongside a cowboy in ass-less chaps. The UniPiper rode in his underwear, his bagpipes filling the streets with his familiar music. A few folks blasted fun music from giant speakers in trailers behind their bikes. We all bopped along and danced to the best of our ability while still balancing on our bikes.
An impressive number of folks went completely naked or donned just a thong for our entire eight-mile route through downtown. Naked men in the cold were unafraid of any Costanzian shame. Some wore nothing but a fanny pack or backpack. One man sported an eggplant costume.
My original plan was to buy two stickers, a Mexican flag and a Canadian flag, one for each breast. Then I was going to draw a heart in the middle of my chest that reads “Love Your Neighbor”. But modern demonstrating while also boycotting Amazon sometimes reduces you to what’s available at Michael’s in the sticker section. Alas, those folks cater more to scrapbooking enthusiasts than the political protest consumer. So I called one of my best friends, a communications expert with more than two decades of public relations and campaign messaging experience. I told her what I had to choose from besides Halloween stickers and “3-D” Eiffel Towers and Big Bens on foam mounting tape.
“Get the cats!” she ordered unilaterally. “Represent the child-free cat ladies.”
We haven’t forgotten about J.D. Vance’s denigration of women who choose not to be mothers. (We are not childless. We are child-free.)
I thought about Patrick Henry and revolutions and muskets, chuckled, and bought the waterproof, UV-resistant multipack of cat stickers. My cat-face Covid-era mask matched the stickers well enough. And friends, those stickers are indeed waterproof. Though they provide no support, I still recommend them for any naked bike ride in the rain.
Cat stickers on boobs won’t singlehandedly save the republic or protect democracy. But I’m damb sure going to try to do my part. School of small fish, my friends. We are bigger and stronger together.
The naked bike ride wasn’t just a visual masterpiece to whimsically disprove the MAGA administration’s absurd propaganda about “war-ravaged” Portland. It was an exuberant outpouring of camaraderie between drenched but smiling people in banana suits and bathrobes, topless people, bottomless people in sombreros, and the delightfully growing contingent of inflatable animal costumes.
On Burnside bridge just before the famous White Stag sign, strangers passed out water bottles and more people helped each other to wrestle clear ponchos on over our helmets when the drizzle turned into pouring rain.
When we passed six or seven unhappy MAGA demonstrators on a sidewalk, they stood grimly, clutching enormous American flags. Hopefully none of those flags touched the ground in violation of the U.S. Flag Code [Title 4 §7. Position and manner of display (n); §8. Respect for flag (b)]. To their credit, they were not aggressive or antagonistic.
“We’ll pray for your souls,” one of them said severely as I slowly, painfully wheezed by. He sounded down. They all looked sad. I’m praying for yours too, this Catholic thought.
(Side note/PSA: anyone who is not a regular cyclist and thinking you can spontaneously ride eight miles in the rain after not having even sat on a bike in 10 years, don’t borrow a fixed-gear bike for a route with significant elevation changes.)
When the route got too steep to roller skate safely, one helpful cyclist “towed” a skater wearing nothing but a red speedo, elbow pads, and knee pads. It wasn’t until we got to level ground that these strangers introduced themselves, shook hands, and the roller-skater thanked the bicyclist for the safety assist. Another kindness on the friendly parade route.
Peaceful demonstrators leading up to the Emergency Naked Bike Ride have been exercising their First Amendment right to free speech with nightly dance parties in inflatable animal costumes and silent walks lying flowers on the ground in front of the facility ICE is leasing through the city of Portland.
We passed this facility on the final stretch of our route. The sidewalk was already lined with peaceful demonstrators on foot, or inflatable paws, as it were.
My friend and I had fallen to the back of the crowd, just in front of the fire truck protecting our parade route from the rear. When we pulled up to the building on Macadam Ave. someone was blasting Daddy Yankee’s “Gasolina”. One man in nothing but shoes and a bike helmet danced his heart, and everything else, out to the reggaeton classic in the middle of the crowd. He looked so happy.
Masked men stood on the roof with their rubber bullet guns, filming us with their cell phones. They wore bulletproof vests variously emblazoned “POLICE” and “ERO”, (Enforcement and Removal Operations, a division of ICE.) One of them took his mask off to eat chili or soup from a to-go cup. He looked bemused but not aggressive. To the extent that you can read someone’s mind by their body language, the other five or six seemed to be flexing their “power” and “authority” despite the fact that there was no need for them to be standing up there like medieval archers on ramparts.
They are not under siege. There is no danger. There is no violence. Except when they attack innocent people exercising their First Amendment right to free speech.
“The court recognized what we’ve said all along: there is no rebellion, no invasion, and no justification for militarizing our communities. The President cannot keep playing whack-a-mole with different states’ Guard units to get around court orders and the rule of law,” Oregon Attorney General Dan Rayfield said recently.
When the first naked bike-riders rounded the corner and filled the street, they rang bells, cheered, and sang. They were smiling, laughing, and happy.
To my utter delight, two of the now-famous Portland Frogs were standing across the street waving at everyone. I hugged one of them and thanked her for inspiring so many people.
“Sorry, it’s hard to hug in these,” she said when we couldn’t exactly get our arms around each other in a proper hug. People were lined up to interview them and take pictures with them. They were so gracious and kind to everyone.
They continue to exemplify our peaceful resistance.
Oregonians are peaceful. We are harmless. And we will get naked in the rain to disprove propaganda designed to incite violence.
Hundreds of strangers rode together knowing that every last one of us believes in human rights and the rule of law. Compassion can be joyful. The Emergency World Naked Bike Ride was a welcoming body-positive celebration of all ages, body types, physiques, fitness levels, genders, and cultures. It was a collective affirmation that our activism is not violent. It was fun, welcoming, community-oriented, silly, and resilient. Like us.
To all who risked ICE violence, here’s hoping the terrified detainees inside the boarded-up facility could hear us shouting and singing for their humanity and their freedom. Not just because their civil rights are constitutionally enshrined (they are, regardless of nationality, ethnicity, or immigration status) but because it’s the right thing to do.
We hope they can hear their neighbors cheering with their whole hearts, “Immigrants Are Welcome Here” and “El Pueblo, Unido, Jamás Será Vencido.”
We’ll keep standing up for them, for all of us, and for this country. See you all on Saturday, October 18th for the next No Kings peaceful march. Click here to find peace-loving people at the march closest to you.
To read Portland City Councilor Angelita Morillo’s current update on the ICE processing facility on Macadam Ave. click here.